RELATIONSHIPS

What Do You Do If Parents Don’t Approve?

 

You think he’s pretty great, things have been going well and you’re ready to introduce him to those two wonderful people that raised you into the woman you are today. You hope that everything goes better than okay – but when they meet your Mr. Could Be Something Wonderful, they think he’s… eh.

When your family doesn’t approve of the guy you’re dating – or his family doesn’t approve of you – it can be a very big strain on your relationship. And especially puts a dent in any proposal or wedding plans. If you’re dealing with parents who just aren’t seeing your mate as you see them, consider these things:

Ask Them Why

Was it how he spoke to you? Treated you? Do they not like his job or his viewpoints? Ask your family what irks them about your partner and encourage them to be specific. While you might not want to hear it, your parents know you better than you think – and their opinion might just be accurate. If there are really big reasons why he might not be a match for you, you need to hear them from an outside perspective.

You’re Building a Future

So, you have never gotten along with your family and you’ve never felt that special bond that you wanted to have. While it’s disappointing, it is encouraging that you’ve met someone that you want to share your life with, and possibly begin a family with. It might be difficult to swallow your parents’ disapproval or even sad, but try to think of the great things ahead of you and just how different you’ll be than the house that raised you. 

Find a Shared Interest

Maybe your father likes to fish and your guy does, too. Or perhaps you and his mom are both bakers. Find something that you have in common and plan a joined activity. By sharing a mutual love for something, it can bring you closer and open up more things that you might agree on, causing those tensions to fall away.

Be Honest With Yourself

At the end of the day, it’s your life, your love, your relationship. While family is a big part, it isn’t the end-all-be-all. You and your partner must decide what’s most important to you and if the opinions of your parents will negatively or positively affect your future and relationship.

Photo Credit: Rachael Nicole Photography

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