Under Pressure: Rushed Into Marriage
About a year ago I was asked to be my cousin’s bridesmaid for her wedding. I was bit taken aback by the invitation at first because 1.) I haven’t heard from my cousin in years and thought she was still a child, and 2.) I thought she was way too young to be getting married anyway (she was 20-years-old at the time). Well, fast forward to the day of the wedding as I waddled around in these awful shoes and an unflattering green dress, and suddenly it was a different story. Even though I was only 21 at the time, the majority of my family and friends that approached me that day kept asking me, “So when are you going to get married?” Me? What’s the rush?
Too often I hear about this pressure to rush into marriage, find that perfect guy and get that ring on your finger as if it was a triathlon. Getting engaged is such a huge life altering decision; it seems like that would be the last thing anyone would want to hastily rush through without careful thinking. And besides pressure from pushy family members, I also notice different mediums promoting the idea of rushing to the alter. I know my job is to research and read wedding and relationship related blogs all day, but after awhile I notice myself feeding into it all. Suddenly I start to feel as if I really want to be a part of all this, which is kind of scary. But there are so many women out there that echo that same sentiment. They might see their best-friend get married or watch a really lavish wedding on TV and then start to think, “I want that.” And if they are lucky to have a good, stable relationship with someone they love, perhaps it would affect their decision to get engaged sooner. But is this a healthy attitude to have? What do you guys think about rushing into marriage?
New Regional Directory Launched Today
We know how hard it is when it comes to engagement ring shopping or wedding planning. Luckily, the Engagement 101 Regional Directory was just launched today! Our Regional Directory is a portal where our engagement community can find local vendors in their area. Searching by city, state and zip, users can find businesses right in their area that offer everything you’re looking for, whether it’s engagement rings, bridal rings or wedding accessories. Right now, the section is still new, but keep checking back as we continue to add more and more stores.
The Big List of Awful Gifts for Him
OK, so we did the big list of awful gifts for her, now it’s his turn.
So guys’ taste on gift buying can be a little shake-y, but women are no better; sometimes their less-than smart choices can be awfully lazy. Does your fiance really need another razor? Here’s a list of some shabby gifts that would send any man questioning how deep his commitment is.
Ties / Razors / Other stuff he already owns
Growing up, every Christmas/Birthday/Valentine’s Day my dad always got the same thing from my mom — a tie. I don’t know how he put up with it. It’s the absolute laziest gift idea ever. Why not buy him some socks while you’re at it?
Wii Fit
It seems like a good gift idea. I mean, hey, guys like video games, right? And now they can play video games and exercise! Cool beans, right? In fact, this looks like something you can use, too. Perhaps you two can use it together and have lots of fun and lose weight, right? Liar! You bought this for yourself, admit it! You knew he would never use it and you were probably hoping he never would. Gift giving rule #1: Don’t buy gifts that are secretly meant for yourself.
Cutsy lovey-dovey stuff
We all know it’s wrong, but we seem to keep doing it anyway. There’s just something about the way that little stuffed panda looks while sitting on the shelf at Rite-Aid. It’s holding a heart-shaped pillow that say, “I Wove Wu!” How adorable! It totally incorporates everything you love about your sweetie, which is why you’re going to buy it, right? Don’t do it! What could a man do with a stuffed animal anyway besides hurl it out the window during a heated argument? No matter how cute it is, if your fiance is older than 9, don’t even think about it.
Economy forcing more long-term engagements?
With the state of the economy the way it is, most wannabe brides and grooms are pushing their wedding dates further and further. Some couples just are not financially stable enough to throw a wedding, while others are trying to wait out the current hardships and plan their big day during better times. But of course, there are also those couples who are just waiting until they feel ready. After all, if they truly love each other, then a little wait wouldn’t matter, right? What do you guys think of long-term (2-3+ years) engagements?
Broken Engagement: Lost the guy, but keep the ring?
When Bachelor Jason Mesnick broke up with Melissa Rycroft on national television, she politely gave the engagement ring back, but should she have? Author Christine Gallagher (The Woman’s Book of Revenge: Tips on Getting Even When ‘Mr. Right’ Turns Out to Be All Wrong) says Melissa has every right to keep the ring, reports E! Online.
“She should demand that ring, demand the show give her the ring,” Gallagher says. “She should make big deal out of it. That ring is worth a ton of money and it could be a nice little cash prize for her. I know that would make me feel better.”
Is it right to keep the ring after a canceled engagement? What do you guys think?
So He Bought You an Ugly Ring…
Everything’s perfect. You’re in love, you have the guy of your dreams, and you know he’s about to propose — and he does! But the ring? Eh…
It happens more often than you would think, and although it seems a bit selfish to pout over an engagement ring, it’s understandable and no way does it equate selfishness. There’s nothing wrong with wanting what you like. If you ordered a salad and instead got a hot dog, surely you should have the right to be disappointed. But telling your fiance that he picked the wrong ring is definitely like treading into dangerous waters. For one, you don’t want to hurt anyone’s feelings, and two, isn’t it the thought that counts anyway? A true dilemma. So what should you do?
First of all, this depends on what type of open relationship you have with your fiance. For one, you should be honest, but you don’t want to hurt his feelings. Don’t come across as angry or whiny; just sit him down and in a calm, loving way explain to him that you would want to exchange the ring. Communication is key for a successful relationship, and perhaps biting your tongue and sucking it up might work with some relationships, but it’s better to be open and honest. Next time remember to go ring shopping together or at least let him know of the type of rings you like and then let him do the rest. If the situation becomes ugly, then simply think of it as an early omen and slowly back away…
How to Pull Off a Winter Wedding
As the snow continues to melt here in NYC, I can’t help thinking about how impatient I am for Spring to start. And then I start thinking about the usual stampede of Summer weddings that take place between May through August. But as amazing it is to celebrate your special day surrounded by warm sun rays and flowers, for those who do like the wintery tundra, you might be in for surprise. A winter themed wedding can be surprisingly gorgeous and will set you apart from the usual June rat race of crazy brides trying to book their weddings on the same weekend. Oh, and did we mention they’re also cheaper too? Below are a few finds I found on several websites of winter themed looks that any wedding can pull off:
The Setting
Try looking for a nice inn or a perhaps a large luxurious cabin — somewhere with a large fireplace and a huge window that will show off the that winter wonderland landscape.
The Dress
Finding a wedding dress that will keep you warm will be hard, but don’t let this discourage you. Instead, go ahead and pick out whatever dress you like and drape the dress with warm accessories, like a shawl or sweater.
EDIT: Good news! Those of you who have been asking us about the credit for this dress (and we apologize for not having one when we first published this post), you’ll be happy to know that we finally learned the designer. The dress is by Atelier Aimee, a favorite dress designer of ours.
The Cake
For the decor, go for something winter themed, complete with snowflakes, icicles, the works.
The Big List of Awful Gifts for Her
Besides going through the difficult steps of choosing a ring, guys also have to be mindful of buying gifts that will please and not cheese the pants off the women they so passionately love. Unfortunately, for some guys, they can’t help falling just short of the finishing line. Here’s a list of three crappy gifts that will surely send any woman running into the arms of Possible Suitor #2.
Vermont Teddy Bear
This infamous bear (with a pricey $80 price tag) loves to come out of hibernation right in time for Valentine’s Day. Commercials for the cuddly bears clog televisions as clueless guys scratch their heads and think, “You know, I think a teddy bear dressed like a bandit is exactly what she needs.” Don’t do it! Men fall for this every year, and how can you blame them? I mean, the bears are kind of cute, zx 630 I guess. But $80 for a pathetic bear dressed like a bandit? And what use will come out of this bear? Will it just sit and stare blankly at you as it watches your decaying relationship? *tisk tisk tisk* You could have used that money for something she’ll actually use. No man would ever think of dragging their wife or girlfriend to the nearest Build-A-Bear to pick out a present, so what makes you think an overpriced teddy bear is on the top of every woman’s wish list? Our advice: Save your money, ditch the bear, buy your girl an iPod full of all her favorite tunes.
Gamesforherbyyou.com
This new start-up company has decided to tap into the video game/romance industry (who knew they even had one?) Basically, the gist of the site is you pay money to create games for your girlfriend, which you then play together. The site isn’t exactly clear on what these games actually are (Does it consist of games designed to play on a computer or games for real life?), and they want you to cough up money to find out — $29 for a one-year membership. So what comes inside this $29 one-year package?
-Step by step instructions. It’s easy to put everything together with our guides.
-PDFs so you can print out the game elements you’ll need (saving lots of time).
-Photos of real completed game elements that you can copy (if you want – it’s up to you).
First of all, whatever these games are, there’s no fun in having to put them together yourself. Plus, there’s something very anti-romantic about the idea of walking up and down the aisles of Wal-mart buying supplies in preparation for this game you bought on the internet. Is that really what your girlfriend wants? Besides, if you wanted to be creative and build a game for your sweetheart, why not use your brain and save your $29 for something she’ll actually use; something she won’t feel embarrassed talking about.
The Snuggie
This as-seen-on-TV item is a blanket with sleeves because, you know, old-fashioned blankets are just soo last year. Men, I don’t care how bad she begged you for this overpriced backwards bathrobe; just don’t do it! There’s nothing sexy about laying around the house watching American Idol while dressed like your own personal monk. Sure, the Snuggie might keep you both warm, but it’ll keep the bedroom cold.
How to Break an Engagement…Hollywood Style
Get tips from the very sexy Megan Fox. She is now single and available as she gave the boot to Brian Austin Green, according to a report in Usmagazine.com. Which leaves us to wonder and ponder…do actors really fall in love or is there some kind of law of this very special Hollywood jungle? Once their partner is not helping you climb the Fame ladder, it does seem they quickly decide to move on. Or perhaps we’re being too caustic?
Both actors, who are choosing to focus on their careers, according to the website, met in 2004, got engaged in November 2006, and have tattoos of each others’ names on their bodies.
Fox is back on the big screen once again as Mikaela in Transformers: Revenge of the Fallen, due for a June release, while Green has been bolstering his resume as a regular on the TV series Terminator: The Sarah Connor Chronicles.
Engagement 101 TV, Episode 1
Getting Acquainted. Three girls and a guy discuss relationships, proposals and rings.
