Do’s and Don’ts of Proposing

 

Everyone wants guidelines. It’s hard not to when you’re taking a huge step in your relationship. Here are a few things that are important to keep in mind before getting engaged.

Do…Talk to her parents/parental-figures

This way seem old-fashioned, but my husband always says his biggest regret is not doing the typical asking-for-permission bit, and my dad’s feelings were hurt that he didn’t get to go through that with him. While this may open the possibility of the parents saying no, I didn’t say to actually ask for permission. I think it’s important to inform her parents that you intend to propose, and see what their reactions are. Odds are if they aren’t happy, you can win them over.

Don’t… Propose for the wrong reasons

Maybe there’s an unexpected bun in the oven or maybe there’s pressure because everyone around you is getting engaged– but don’t let that be what influences your decision. You don’t want to get engaged or married for the wrong reasons. It is a HUGE commitment.

Do… Talk about it first

I don’t mean be like, “Hey, babe, I’m going to propose!” I mean don’t propose if you guys haven’t talked marriage/ serious-commitment. You don’t want to make that plunge and find out in the moment that she’s not ready just yet. Talk about your life goals, what you want as individuals and as a couple, and slip the “marriage bit” into the conversation and see how it goes! You don’t want to be kneeling on one knee after an awesome flash mob, only for her to be embarrassed and ask you if she can talk to you privately.

Don’t… Ever PRETEND you are proposing as a prank

THIS IS NOT A DRILL. While you may want to practice your speech, or your dance, or whatever it is you have planned, you DO NOT under any circumstances want to pretend you’re proposing to her and then pull the plug at the end of your speech. ONLY propose to her FOR REAL. DO YOU READ ME?

As always: GOOD LUCK!

Emily

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